Head on the Table

Sarcasm, satire and cartoons

John Carter of Mars Movie Review (Well, the way I do a review)

Written By: Sy - Jun• 17•12

Previous movie reviews of mine that have been received favorably include Tron II, of which I said that if you are planning on going to see this movie make sure  that you bring something to read, and also my review of The Expendables. I thought the review was kind of long, but was then told by someone I know that I only touched on subjects that could have been expanded on more, but that they liked the review anyway.

John Carter falls somewhere in between these two.

The one thing that stood out for me about the John Carter movie was that I never saw him eat or drink anything.

I’m serious. This is something that I often watch for in movies. Here he is, an Earthling who is transported to Mars via an alien device and spends a considerable amount of time up there (days), fights a bunch of battles, gets his own ass kicked a few times but never has a drop water or a bite of food. I might have gotten distracted and missed it, but I don’t think I did.

Silly? Maybe, but I have to do something to occupy my mind during movies this tedious.

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